Motivation, Success, Hot Coffee

Not motivated today I have a big long list and I just want to keep cozy and avoid the future a few more days.

I am off to meet with an adviser at one of the community colleges, quit a job, find a new job, make long term financial, academic, fitness and nutrition plans.

I am having a temper tantrum inside. I want someone else to do all of that for me. I want someone to say, girl this is exactly what you should do, go, be. I am recognizing that I hate making decisions, especially big ones that have long term implications. This s exactly how I ended up in this position. I make hasty decisions once I've painted myself into a corner. Avoiding that puts a lot of history on the table.

The sense of accomplishment compared with the internal struggle of taking the first step are the golden coins in the balance of justice.