What I mean by that is Lady Boss. I mean I have my allies and not enough enemies to worry about. Almost as if a hose with a kink has suddenly opened and all of that pressure is free.
Don't act surprised. I am a simple creature with a complex set of drives. It is not enough to tuck me into bed after fucking me. I may not even like or want to fuck, I just do, because it is easier than arguing no, it's easier than saying, I think we're not comparable , it's easy enough to get fucked.
What's not easy is finding safe passage across the mine laddened terrain of my heart.
Some people are born with a compass and carry a lamp to light the darkness.
People whom I love who have seen the shit and blood flow from my veins have been expecting this transition.
I am flying over the Western United States. There is turbulence. I am not afraid.
The Ex has been on my mind. I am wondering if I should save our Christmas story for another post.
****
Violence circled him. He would come home from a bar and tell me about it hat had happened, how out of nowhere this person just went all haywire and how it was only self defense.
It was a small town and word got around that he was a wild one. A loose canon. He was my boyfriend.
Two nights before Christmas we'd gone out for some drinks and in his typical style he had intervened in some brawl. This time no one got hurt.
I drove us home. When we got there he to me he had just slammed a line of speed in the bathroom with Marco. I thought it was blow, he said as if that justified the action.
We had talked about how drugs made him horny. Somehow this led to him eating a handful of Viagra.
I don't need to go in to detail about the rest of the night.
Walking was uncomfortable at work the next day. I stopped at Ralph's and bought some oranges and soup.
Christmas came. Christmas went.
I recovered my sense of balance and my body stopped hurting before the new year.
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