Instincts and Survival

I am unqualified to be in a caregiving position. I am not patient with illness or my mother. The ill version is spectacular in her independent need to suffer. 

This morning she said she would like a juice smoothie. What kind, my brother and I asked her, berry or something else. No not those I just want a plain one with macca with a coconut milk base, I don't want all that sugar. Mom, I don't know if I'm going to be able to find that for you, I said. Well, I thought, that's what I get for asking. 

I went to the mess hall and bought her a green juice. Oh this is not bad she said, sipping it down.

Now we're arguing about her diet. That she doesn't eat and has osteoporosis and is a vegetarian and is unwilling to address reality outside of her perception.